5 Types of Girls You Know You’ve Seen at the Gym

August 19, 2015 Luas Redbird

Now we all know there are an outrageous amount of stereotypes at the gym.

Of course, who could forget should classic characters as:

The guy that screams on every rep (no matter how heavy)
Sir Nevertrains-Legs and his magnificent curls!
Tedious Mr Tough Mudder
The Half-Rep Powerlifter (Squatting heavy never looked so easy!)
The ninja known only as ‘Howmanysetsleftbro?”
The Personal Trainer that personally doesn’t train

Actually, I can think of a shitload more. We may potentially do an article on this in the future.

Basically what I’m saying is that we know these guys quite well.

But what about the gals?

Surely female gym-goers have stereotypes as well?

Of course they do, it would be sexist to assume otherwise…

And now in the name of gender equality, I will rattle off just a few of the types of girls I’ve noticed when frequenting my local gymnasium.

1. Miss Makeup

This is the type of girl who somehow confused reflective clothing and gym gear as the same thing – mainly because they’re both labelled as activewear.

Her clothes are more neon than the start of a night at a Bangkok Brothel – and her face is more covered than the staff at the end of one.

The main case these girls argue as their reason for coating themselves in cosmetics is that they want to ‘look good for the gym’.

Good for who?

Because the only thing a shotgunned face full of makeup says is that you’re more into your appearance than your training. If that’s your angle – you’re not taking this shit seriously, and if you’re main motivation is to get noticed in the gym. Chances are you’re gonna be a distraction.

The last thing I want to see when I’m lifting serious weight is an attention seeking girl, because it’ll be the last thing I see. The excess blood pressure from both the lift and the rage will literally blow up my brain.

Don’t be a ho, save a bro.

2. Selfie Sister (Although I’ve seen guys do this too)

We’ve all seen this girl unfortunately. And I kind of get it… to an extent. You’re working hard in the gym and you’ve got that fresh pump feeling – you want to remember the moment. Our Lord and Savior Arnold Schwarzenegger describes the pump as ‘cumming’, and he’s right.

But here’s the problem:

When I’m cumming, the last thing I want to do is to take photos of the occasion. I want to enjoy the moment and embrace the experience, splurging my gains all over the gym floor. The last thing I want to do is capture these most vulnerable moments in the name of Facebook likes.

Honestly, when they come up in your feed, how many times have you liked those photos, hell how many times have you actually looked at them?

Unless they’re ridiculously hot and look something like this:

It’s never.

Go on sister, post that status, get a like off your mom and follow it up by saying you’re now treating yourself to a pizza – Then leave the gym.

3. Girls that actually lift

Rare. But there. These are the girls with fantastic bodies who day-in, day-out make serious gains.

They usually where some kind of loud workout t-shirt which talks about how tough they are. However, we’re willing to forgive this cringe worthiness as a small concession for the price to witness those glorious gains.

4. Mrs Mid-Life Crisis

A sub category of the girls that actually lift – but less about themselves.

I actually have a ton of respect for Mrs Mid-Life Crisis. This is the woman in her more mature years who just decides to absolutely kill it at the gym. They’re few and far between but they are glorious creatures to behold. Mainly because they can usually squat your max on a warmup.

They don’t care about looking good, or what they’re friends on Facebook think – they’re literally just doing this out of pure passion. The side effect of this being they actually look incredible. Done right, this is some serious milf territory.

They’re either in first thing in the morning or straight after dropping their kids off at school, either way they’re gonna be there a while.

5. Class Clown

You probably won’t know this woman much, chances are she’s never actually stepped foot on the gym floor. This is the girl that turns up exclusively for classes.

Their entire exercise regime relies solely on this cookie-cutter style gym session which only really seems to train their ability at taking orders. Yet sadly, they believe it’s given them serious results, despite the fact they rarely show any.

Unfortunately, most of these classes are aimed at entry level gym-goers, it’s not going to inspire any rapid transformation or weight loss with you turning up to yoga once a week.

What these gals need is their own regime, to venture into the jungle of gains, do some squats and build a hut of independently earned muscle, rather than the costly fads they’ve been swept up in.

6. Cardio Bunny

Weights do not exist to the cardio bunny. Making them similar to the ‘Class Clown’ stereotype above – they pay the same membership you do just to perform the worst kind of exercise there is.

Not much to say here except that if all you’re going to do is run – there’s a park nearby. Save your money.

And before you go all:

Remember:

Overall Conclusion

As you can see, not just the guys fall into certain ‘types’ at the gym, but girls as well.

Some of them are welcomed, and some of the them not so much. Regardless, the main takeaway here is that the number of female gym members is growing – to the point that we can categorize them.

This can only be a good thing, and helps dissuade the stereotype that girls who workout are manly – this is unbelievably untrue. What we need are more girls working out to show the world what an awesome thing it creates.

And as long as they’re as good as bros at staying the hell away from us during a set – the more the merrier.